So confused.

I don't know what i want anymore! (in regards to dating and the opposite sex.)

Part of the time i sit and say, "I want a boyfriend." Then when someone pops up in my life, i get excited . . . and then it fizzles, I can't like anybody the regular way, i'm just waiting for that moment to happen again. Have you ever had "that" moment?

Maybe you don't know what "that" moment is, its a moment in time, when everything changes. When the world seems to tip over, and volcanoes explode as the earth shakes under your feet. I'm waiting for the moment my heart chooses. I want one moment of pure bliss, to change into a rocky tunnel. I want to like someone randomly, were within a moment my heart changes places and I'm left confused, wondering where it went--when suddenly i realize someone else held it in their hands.

I've had that happen twice, and maybe that's why this whole dating and liking guy business annoys me. I don't want to gradually like anyone, it seems fake and un-real. All i care with those guys is kissing them, but when its real . . . i know its different. I'm not drawn by lust, something else tugs at me.

Maybe I'm destined to walk the roads alone. Maybe, just maybe, i'm not meant to be held at this point in my life. Maybe just maybe, i should forget guys and work on my life goals.

So much easier said then done. -sighs-

-Kat